Apologia Pro Lacuna Meo

Sometimes I seem to just say the wrong things.
I open my mouth and words fall out
In all the wrong places.

Sometimes I don't even know why I say it.
I don't think. I misinterpret. I'm just plain stupid.
I never mean it.
I never mean to upset you.
I never mean to make you angry.
I never mean to wreck it all and yet
Over
And Over
And Over
Again
I do.
I'm Sorry.

Beaching

The wash of the sea.
The burning brand.
Everything hurts eyes that have seen too much salt.

A Fairytale Ending

Run away little Girl, run away
the blind man said.
Go where they can't hurt you.
Don't follow your dreams, look
to the ground.
And be thankful you're higher than that.

Hide in the dark little Girl,
it's safer where they can't see you.
Where no one knows
where to seek you out
so they can't see to stab you,
to tear it all away from you.

Don't look back little Girl,
In case they catch you.
Snaring, snatching fingers
to have and hold and hinder.
The trees are vicious here
and the rivers full of dead water.

Hide from the world little Girl,
you don't want the anguish.
It's easier to pretend it doesn't exist.
In your gingerbread cottage,
your own only friend.
Until you become the Witch.

Xxx

The world Changed.
From the first caress,
the brush of mouth on mine and You
And I
To We and you to me
and me and all of me to you
because this is all I can do.
Won, lost, my gift to you

What Sounds Like Nonsense

A kiss, one kiss. You touched my mind.
I fought a battle, won and lost in time.
A hand to to take and hold in mine.
A memory spun in threads so fine.

Child to child to woman to man.
Breathing a light, softer, heart ran.
Take it, you take it, fast as I can.
Roll up the reel, let the film pan.

Onwards and upwards let the dream play.
Here we can hear the words are to stay.
Stars in the sky and the sun's out to play.
Take me outside to the dawning of day.

Film

The image is grainy.
Blurred.
But I don't need to see clearly
To know what it is I'm looking at.

I can see the colour of his skin
Though the camera's bleached it white.

I know the shape of his mouth
Though it's near invisible in this picture.

I know the way he looks at me
Though his eyes are pixellated
Just dark squares here.

I know what a picture cannot see.
I know the feel, the scent, the life of him.

It's imprinted on my heart.

Defender Of Men

When I stumble, it's you who stops me falling.
You catch me before I hit the ground
And hold me
Until I feel safe again.

When it's raining, you bring out the sun.
It beams from your eyes
And from your smile.

When I've sunk to the deepest depths,
It's you who dives too.
To wrap an arm around my waist and hoist me
Until I'm flying.

When I'm on top of the world, you take me to the moon.
You make a good day
A thousand times better.

It's you who tracks my footprints
Waiting for the falters,
To spring forward and coach me on.
I lean on you,
Rely on you,
Look up to you.
Without you i'd have tripped and broken four hundred times or more
This past year.